Men’s Mental Health Month: why it matters for dads
Becoming a dad is one of the biggest changes in a man’s life. It can bring joy, pride and a new sense of purpose. It can also bring broken sleep, new worries, pressure at work and at home, and less time for yourself. For many dads, those feelings stay hidden.
November is Men’s Mental Health Month, a chance to talk about how men are really feeling, and to say that looking after your mental health is part of being a good parent.
Why dads’ mental health matters
When a dad feels low, anxious or overwhelmed, it can affect the whole family, including his own wellbeing, his relationship with his partner and how he connects with his children. The reverse is true too. When dads feel supported and confident, families feel it as well. One dad supported by Home-Start Cymru put it like this:
“It was confidential and non-judgemental, no pressure and a load taken off my shoulders. The support influenced the whole of the family, not just the individual involved.”
Why dads can find it hard to ask for help
Many dads find the same things get in the way:
- Feeling they should be the strong one, or just get on with it
- Support that’s often aimed at mums, especially around the birth and early weeks, so dads don’t know where to go or whether it’s for them
- Worrying about being judged, or about making a fuss
- Having very little time, between work, family and everything else
Support for fathers, particularly in the perinatal period, is still limited, and attitudes towards men and mental health mean dads are often a seldom-heard group. That’s why we speak up for dads as well as supporting them.
Small things that can help
Some of these will feel doable and some won’t, and that’s OK. Pick the one that works today.
- Talk to someone you trust
- Move your body, even with a short walk
- Protect your sleep where you can
- Take a break from work
- Cut back on alcohol and screen time when you can
- Ask for help early, before things build up
And be kind to yourself on the days you manage none of them.
How we support dads
At Home-Start Cymru, we offer:
- One-to-one emotional support for dads who feel stressed or low in confidence
- Help with bonding and building relationships with their children
- Help finding and navigating services
- Group and peer activities, including our Pembrokeshire project reaching new dads
Our support is free, confidential and non-judgemental, and it’s shaped around what matters to each family.
We also act as secretariat for the Cross-Party Group on Fathers’ Wellbeing and Family Resilience at the Senedd, which brings together Senedd Members from four political parties and organisations from many sectors to look at gaps in support for fathers.
If you’re a dad, or know one
If you’re a dad, you don’t have to wait until things are really hard. Get in touch to see how we may be able to help: info@homestartcymru.org.uk or 0333 880 0014. For more advice, Dad Matters, part of the Home-Start network, has blogs for dads: Dad Matters | Blogs.
If you know a dad, ask how he’s really doing, and be ready to listen. A message, a walk or a cuppa can mean more than you know.
If you need urgent support, Samaritans are free to call on 116 123. In an emergency, call 999.
Every family goes through tough times, and dads count too.
